 
 
>mall_milkman
_
~7,936
^jack
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
Gah!
~82,752
[COLD SNAKE
Now that's what I call a blood curdling scream.
~209,604
Not even the refrigeration of your cooling suit could have kept the milk in your veins fresh for that long!
~408,576
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
ICY your mental skills haven't thawed a bit, Snake.
~750,282
...Just like COLD times.
~865,938
[COLD SNAKE
Do I know you?!
~912,258
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
Snake, we're not SNOW different, you and I...
~1,173,549
The CHILLdren of a COLDer generation.
~1,373,072
[COLD SNAKE
What do you mean?! Who are you?!
~1,453,841
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
My father...
~1,549,798
...My father was one of the Three Wise Men who created the SOC system...
~1,937,190
He was well on his way to inherit the title of Father Christmas...
~2,231,808
...when in a freak accident at San Hieronymo...
~2,434,227
... His body literally burned itself up!
~2,584,608
[COLD SNAKE
That special, blue FOX sneaking suit.
~2,698,474
You must be Python's kid. 
~2,769,308
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
Please, Snake. Father had a name.
~2,988,922
"Python" was just a code name given to him by FOX.
~3,294,240
Those who truly loved him, knew him by his birthname...
~3,556,888
Frosty Frost!
~3,635,712
[COLD SNAKE
Frosty the Snowman! And that would make you...
~3,776,437
[GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT
Jack Frost, his son!
~3,946,496
This suit... It was the only thing they could recover off of my father's melted remains.
~4,381,330
[COLD SNAKE
A cooling suit filled with liquid nitrogen. That explains the sub-zero temperatures of your milk bombs.
~4,624,243
[JACK FROST
It was my father's legacy -- and that which allowed me to become the world's greatest milk man...
~5,025,627
...delivering the coldest, freshest milk in even the hottest of temperatures.
~5,357,658
However, not even the liquid nitrogen from my suit COOLed have saved my milk from the blistering stupidity of human ignorance!
~5,923,302
[COLD SNAKE
Human ignorance?
~5,984,601
[JACK FROST
"Leave it by the door", they'd say...
~6,139,470
As if such a thing were even conceivable!
~6,306,816
My milk! That which I have literally "poured" my life into!
~6,627,894
To sit out in the sun?! Beads of sweat forming on its glassy container, curdling ever closer to its date of expiration!
~7,289,483
My gift to the world was a gift of the present -- a transient gift that could neither be enjoyed in the past, nor the future.
~7,928,631
I longed to find a way to do it faster -- to deliver it fresher!!
~8,253,207
I needed a way to deliver my milk directly into any house from anywhere in the world!!!
~8,606,889
I needed...
~8,702,586
... Merry Gear.
~8,778,797
[COLD SNAKE
Merry Gear?!
~8,824,564
[JACK FROST
Yes, Merry Gear!
~8,920,834
A bipedal sleigh with the ability to launch gifts from any location!
~9,205,563
It was the Three Wise Men's failsafe, a means to keep Christmas alive should all three of the Wise Men pass on.
~9,692,472
But it could only be activated with the entry of three secret passcodes -- one from each of the Three Wise Men.
~10,217,719
You see, the members of the Three Wise Men were part of an agreement...
~10,506,878
...a pact that bound each of them to enter their secret passcodes upon their deathbeds...
~10,849,378
It was a way of ensuring Christmas would go on -- a pact that would ensure the activation of the Merry Gear at the right time.
~11,362,967
My father, Frosty, upheld his part of the agreement, and entrusted his passcode to me...
~11,871,160
Between the three Ghosts of Christmas Past, we had two passwords. We needed just one more.
~12,366,415
[COLD SNAKE
So that's why the Ghosts are demanding Nick's brain!
~12,478,033
[JACK FROST
Yes, your unexpected assassination of Saint Nick in the Secret Santa Incident prevented Santa from entering the third and final passcode!
~13,092,864
We had planned to obtain Saint Nick's brain and extract the final passcode, giving us access to the Merry Gear!
~13,543,387
[COLD SNAKE
But how would this help you deliver your milk?
~13,646,492
[JACK FROST
Snake, you aren't thinking outside of the box.
~13,896,853
Or, rather, perhaps that is EXACTLY what you are doing!
~14,149,987
[COLD SNAKE
What do you mean?
~14,204,828
[JACK FROST
Think, Snake. If the Merry Gear is only capable of launching gift boxes.
~14,569,595
[COLD SNAKE
Put the milk in a gift box!
~14,646,152
[JACK FROST
Yes, the greatest gift of all!
~14,979,107
Snake! It was only my dream to make the world a happier place through milk...
~15,500,227
[COLD SNAKE
It seems that your dreams have expired...
~15,597,247
[JACK FROST
And I along with them.
~15,796,534
But don't cry...
~15,946,483
...I'll be back again some day!
~16,236,537
THE PRESENT!
~16,547,442
[COLD SNAKE
I guess there's no use crying... over spilled milk...